Who is God?

ps: This post is purely fiction

I'd been volunteering in a home for the mentally challenged. Every Saturday I'd go to the home and spend some time with the adults and children there. I'd try and teach some of the kids or I'd spend some time talking with the adults. We would sit together and make beads, weave carpets, learn to count change, try and pronounce our names etc.

The kids were easier to handle and more eager to learn. The adults were of course slightly different. They'd take offense if you tried to teach them something. So you had to do it with tact. You couldn't tell them that 'they had to go to the toilet'. You had to suggest that 'we all make a visit to the loo'.

To see the effort that the people in the home took to do ordinary routine things made me realize how truly blessed I was. I had a 'working mind'. One that could perform the 3R's, one that had learned to identify things, one that enabled me to live, to think clearly(or so I thought!).

And so I went to the home to reinforce my feeling of superiority. To enhance my ego. I truly believed that I was one of God's chosen few. This was all of course till I had my conversation with Ramu.

Ramu is a patient in the home, the same age as me. He'd just moved out from the kids in to the adults. Ramu is among the boisterous, ever-curious, energy personified types. You rarely have a dull moment with him around. Here are a few samples of his misdemeanors.

Ramu was one of the few people who knew how to operate the school bell. Unfortunately this wasn't a good thing because he'd ring it whenever he pleased, and that meant all the children who'd been trained to get up and leave class if the bell rang, would all get up and leave their classes creating a major ruckus in school.

Ramu loved the biscuits you'd get in the tea-shop opposite the road. The prob was he never had any money. So he'd order one of the younger fellows to keep the watchman occupied, then go in to the watchman's cabin and snatch whatever money he could find. He couldn't count the money. So he'd simply buy biscuits for all the money in his hand.

Some girls had come to volunteer and he reportedly told one of them- "that your pants are so tight I can make the outline of your bum!"

He'd been caught by a nurse for peeking in to the ladies' bathroom. His retort was- "If you can see me piss, why can't I see you piss?".

So Ramu wasn't easy to handle and one day the person-in-charge asked me to take care of Ramu as he was being very difficult. I decided that the best way to keep him in leash was to keep him occupied. I looked around the room and pointed to a picture of God.

I sat next to Ramu, folded his hands together and made him close his eyes. I told him to pray to God. For a few moments his eye-lids were closed. And then they opened and there was an extraordinary radiance in his eyes.

"Ajai Anna I've just found out that I am God.".

I laughed and asked him how he'd come to that conclusion.

He said -" I find that whenever I pray to God I'm actually talking to myself!"

"Kaminey"- The Movie Review

I'm not really a movie buff. I'm not much in to watching movies in theaters at all. But every once in a while an exception must be made when family or friends force me.

So last Friday, I was coerced in to watching a movie by mom and sis. Now I knew "Kaminey" was an 'A' rated movie. And I didn't want to be embarrassed watching the movie with family. But they'd already bought the tickets. And no one.. absolutely no one was free at that particular time to fill in for me. So I decided to tug along and watch the movie. It was a Vishal Bharadwaj film after all.

And let me tell you this.. 'Kaminey' is a once in a life-time movie. And I'm glad that I was forced in to that movie hall! Absolutely brilliant! Bharadwaj brings the Guy Ritchie/ Quentin Tarantino style of movie making- tuned to India(or more precisely Mumbai). Though the story is not really new... the treatment is as original as it can get. The writing for this movie is first class.

The story line from the outset is quite predictable... but Bharadwaj keeps you glued to your seats with the pace, twists and turns. The characters don't mouth long tardy dialogues... it's very galli lingo. The entire look and feel of the movie is very earthy and you know that if there were characters like these in real-life, then that's exactly how they'd behave. The humour is dark and intelligent.... the movie goer who enjoys the brainless comedies Hindi movies are famous for will not enjoy this. 'Kaminey' requires, or rather demands, your attention for the complete 2 hours+.


The script is just so well written and so tight, it's unbelievable for an Indian movie! There have been a few good movies that have come out in recent years. But this movie is not parallel cinema. It is basic Hindi movie 'formulaic' fare complete with looove ishtory, judwaa bhais, draamaa, emosion and real 'kaminey' villains...all building up to a climax... but the film still holds despite it's predictability... and that's the beauty of it.

Each one of the ensemble cast- from the corrupt policemen(lolo and lebe), to the politician-don(bhopu!), to the full-time don(tashi- tashi the greeat!), are just wonderfully sketched out and each actor does full justice to his role. The performances of each of the actors are just out-standing and that's what really brings the movie alive. Shahid Kapur(as Guddu and Charlie) is fantastic. The character of Charlie and his trademark lisping of 'f' for 's' is just tremendous. The character impacted us all so much that we were all lisping for 2 days straight. :). Priyanka Chopra(Sweety) is brilliant. She plays and aggro-Marathi babe with such flair (The scene in which she shoots her machine gun in the climax is one of my favourites in the movie). My personal favourites were the guys who played Mikhail and Tashi- killer dudes.. with killer attitudes to boot! : )

And special mention must be made of 'Dhan-te-nan'. The energy in the movie builds up to a crescendo and the song fulfills the requirement as an outlet for all that pent up energy. It moves you and pulls you in to the movie.

I thoroughly enjoyed the movie and I 'fuggeft' that you 'fhould' watch it. I'll be happy to read your commentf on it. ;)

India's 62nd Independence Day

Happy Independence day people!

Well it's time for the patriotic bandha in me to come out. It is after all Independence day. What better day to write a post about your country ah?

I have to be honest here. I feel a bit old. I remember India's 50th independence day celebrations. I remember at exactly 12 noon all the TV channels played Rahman's 'Vande Mataram'. And today I realize it's been 12 years since! That's almost half my life!

Many critics, most famously Winston Churchill,( and more recently some chinese joker named Zhong Guo Zhan Lue Gang) have predicted the end of our nation. We have defied the critics and we continue to march on.

India is not a nation in the conventional sense of the term. We are not one race, or people who speak one language, or follow one religion. We are not exactly a physical entity by ourselves(though this is arguable).

India is an idea. Or, to put it better... India is an ideal. India is not an easy country to understand. It forces man to put aside all his ideas of separation and classification and look at things differently. It forces you to answer difficult questions. It requires you to be tolerant, to be understanding, to be different, to seek the truth, to be lawful, to understand differences, and above all- to challenge convention.

Our founding fathers dreamt up an India that would be an ideal to all humanity. The idea lives on and contiues to inspire us. India to me is a passion. It is pure, it is magic, it is old, it is new, it is vibrant and most of all it is happening!

There are miles and miles to go. There is much to be done. But let's not forget that greatness is our destiny. Let's get together and make our 'tryst with destiny'.

Jai Hind.